December
by alexandrinedamaris
Summary: Sirius has never been this nervous for a first date before, but then again, he's never been on a first date with James before.


Sirius tucked his wand into his back pocket, slung on his favourite leather jacket, the one James had gotten him for his seventeenth birthday, old enough now that the leather was impossibly soft if rather cracked, and walked out the front door, trying his best to push away the fluttering he felt deep in his stomach. He was meeting James for a beer, it wasn't like he was doing something he hadn't done a million times before. Just because, unlike those previous million times, this was an actual date, didn't mean he was allowed to get all nervous about it.

A _date_. Just thinking about the word made a smile tug at his lips as he descended the winding stairs of the building he lived in, his feet moving faster and faster in his haste to be able to apparate away. For the most part, he loved living in a muggle building, but having to walk for ten minutes to find a safe apparition point was not so great, especially when he was already running late, having spent so long making sure his hair was absolutely perfect. James probably wouldn't even notice, he never used to notice back in Hogwarts when Sirius tried to look nice.

"The thing is," Lily had said to him the week previously when Sirius had told her about his date with James, having drank most of the bottle of his favourite wine and starting to slur slightly, "is that you _always_ look nice. Better then nice; stunning. And your eyes-"  
"Right, Lils," Sirius had said with a laugh, pushing her back from the way she'd leaned so far forward, her nose centimetres from his. "I know I have nice eyes."  
"Narcissa has nice eyes," Lily had sighed, leaning back into his sofa. " _Really_ nice eyes."

Sirius smiled, a small thing only for himself, remembering the conversation. He had hoped she would take the news well, and she had, but what he hadn't expected was the onslaught of information about how fantastic Narcissa was immediately after, which in itself was debateable. Still, he couldn't help but feel relieved that he had her approval, and it made him smile even wider than he otherwise would have when he saw James sitting at one of the high tables at their regular pub, sipping a pint of butterbeer and looking a little nervous himself, one hand ruffling his hair in an echo of a habit Sirius had thought gone when he'd first gotten together with Lily.

The other man rose when Sirius approached and pulled Sirius into a quick hug, the old comfort of his best friend against him enough to calm his rapid heartrate.  
"Hey," James said as they drew apart, pushing a second pint of butterbeer over the table to Sirius. He opened his mouth as if to say more, but as his eyes roved over Sirius, lingering on his hair for a second, he seemed to change his mind, a smile pulling at his lips instead.

He looked good, not that James ever looked anything other than spectacular in Sirius's opinion. He had on a shirt Sirius hadn't seen before, a pale blue-grey one that must be new, his jeans deliciously tight. Sirius had to stop himself looking at those jeans too closely, already feeling a blush threaten to rise in his cheeks. He couldn't remember the last time he had actually blushed, barring two weeks ago when he and James, both so drunk neither of them could see straight, ended up snogging frantically on the same sofa Lily had waxed lyrical about Narcissa on several days later. The snog that had revealed a lot about James Sirius suspected James himself hadn't realised, and absolutely nothing about Sirius. He'd been in love with James almost as long as he could remember, and had been as subtle with that as he was everything else; about as much as a screeching banshee.

Still, the years of inner heartache felt worth it now, with James smiling at him from across the table, looking at Sirius like he'd hung the moon, their hands drawing closer and closer together until after their third drink they were tangled together as if they had never been apart, and Sirius felt himself wondering why he'd ever been nervous to begin with. It mostly felt like nothing at all had changed, James still laughed at his every joke and seemed as ready to plot and scheme as he had been five years ago, before Voldemort's Death Eaters forced them apart, and the familiar need to hold James tight and kiss him until the sun came up, and then some more, wasn't exactly new. Then James would shift closer, their heads so close together it would take Sirius less than a second to lean over to press their lips together, his hazel eyes darker than normal, and Sirius would remember it was real, that he could kiss James, and James wouldn't push him away in disgust.

James laughed at something Sirius said, his lips lit up by the candlelight, and with the knowledge that he could, and nothing awful would happen, he leaned forward, brushing his lips against James's, a whisper of a kiss more than anything else. He moved to draw away, but James's hand was already at the back of his head, keeping him close as James kissed back, slow and so sweet Sirius felt he might just melt into his chair. When they did break apart, Sirius's blood was pounding in his ears, his heart ready to burst straight out of his chest.

"I know this is only our first date," James whispered onto his lips, still pressed together though his hand that was cradling Sirius head was now caressing his jaw. "But I think I love you."  
Sirius grinned, feeling like he'd swallowed his star and it was lighting him up from the inside. "I love you."  
James kissed him again, right on his grin, like he could contain himself no more than Sirius could. Sirius slid his hand into his hair, softer than he remembered it being, his grin fading away to better kiss James and then changing to bite gently onto his bottom lip. James made a little sound, the best sound Sirius had ever heard, before their kissing was interrupted by a loud bang at the end of their table.

The barman, for all his noise, was smiling at them. "Get out of here, lovebirds. Won't have no snogging at my bar."  
So James slipped his hand back into Sirius's, and he felt the distinct tug of apparition under his ribcage, unable to stop smiling and completely uncaring of where they ended up. James loved him, and that was all that mattered.


End file.
